“Self-care” means nine completely different things depending on your number. For some it's a tracked, optimised project; for others it's buying a crystal and continuing to sleep at 3am.
Here's the wellness map — chill versus all-in across the top, by-the-book versus punk-mysticism down the side. Find your corner.
By the book
Chill
Slow & steady
96
Gentle but regular — wellness as a quiet habit, not a project.
Hardcore discipline
138
Health run as a KPI: macros tracked, PRs logged, no excuses.
Chill mysticism
54
Believes in the vibes, reads about it for hours, rarely actually does it.
Punk wellness
72
Pulls the latest all-nighter, hoards the priciest supplements to cancel it out.
All-in
Punk / woo
Find your corner
- The hardcore-discipline corner is 1/3/8: macros tracked, PRs logged, zero excuses.
- The punk-wellness corner is 7/2: the latest all-nighter, plus the priciest supplements bought to cancel it out.
- The chill corners (9/6 and 5/4) either keep one quiet habit going or just read about wellness forever.
However you do it, the pattern underneath is your type. Forge your soul and see the wiring — including how you treat yourself under stress.
Strictly for fun — a playful read of the types, not a clinical assessment.